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Not all Unkindness is Bullying

12 Sep 2018

https://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life-and-relationships/parents-need-to-know-not-all-unkindness-is-bullying-20180822-p4zz1v.html

“Not all Unkindness is Bullying”

When I saw this article published in the Sydney Morning Herald, I realised it emphasised both the tension and challenges that the word “bullying” conveys. The article, originally published in the Washington Post, from the point of view of a teacher, asks parents to question their use of the term “bullying”.  The author states “for the rest of their lives, our children's happiness at home and success at work will be determined by how well they can navigate relationships and resolve difficult issues. If we write every unpleasant encounter off as bullying, we don't prepare them well. At a minimum, we are modelling misdiagnosis.”

“Also, calling every act of meanness bullying sends an unhealthy message: It says to kids, 'You're fragile. You can't handle it if anyone is even slightly unkind to you.”

As a society we are quick to make judgements. Parents naturally want to protect their children and are their advocates. However, letting children and young adults work through incidents- both personally and interpersonally – can have lasting benefits.

Our staff are always happy to help parents negotiate this minefield and encourage strong family school relationships. Our wellbeing programmes advocate kindness, respect and problem solving to build resilience. But as educators we also know that many incidents that are named bullying are simple cases of young people not managing their emotions or relationships well. This is all part of growing up and the interactions that occur every day at school, help children navigate to adulthood.